You meet a woman, get her number and then sit down to become the most entertaining man ever to own a telephone. Funny pictures. Clever lines. A carefully timed message about a dog on a skateboard.
What are you trying to achieve? If the answer is to meet her again, why are you building a second career as her unpaid content provider?
My approach to texting is straightforward. Use it to arrange the meeting. Put the important work into the interaction you have in person.
Stop trying to rescue weak attraction with messages
If she liked meeting you, a simple message can be enough to continue the conversation and make a plan. If she wasn't interested, an elaborate texting strategy may just keep you occupied while she carries on with her life.
That doesn't mean nobody ever develops attraction in writing. It means I don't build my cold-approach strategy around repairing an unconvincing introduction with endless messages afterwards. I would rather improve the introduction.
Ask yourself what happened when you met. Was there mutual interest? Did you make your own interest clear? Or did you get a number from a friendly conversation and then decide the number meant more than it did?
There is no shame in discovering that somebody doesn't want a date. Move on. Your next useful lesson may come from another real interaction rather than the twentieth revision of a message to somebody who isn't replying.
Cut the essay
I have made this mistake myself. You think an interaction was particularly good, become excited and write too much. The moment you send it, you start watching the phone. Suddenly you have invested an enormous amount in somebody you barely know.
Keep the message proportionate to the relationship. A woman you have been seeing for a while is different from a stranger you met briefly yesterday. You don't need to send the stranger a romantic account of how the birds were singing when your paths crossed.
Read the message and ask, "Do I need to say this?" If the sentence doesn't help the conversation or the arrangement, leave it out. Short doesn't have to mean cold. It means you respect your time and hers enough to get to the point.
Your tone isn't attached to the text
Sarcasm and sexual innuendo are easy to misread. In person she hears your voice, sees your expression and can respond immediately. A message removes much of that context.
Something that sounds playful in your head can look rude or overly sexual on her screen. You don't get to stand beside her explaining the clever delivery you intended.
If a point depends heavily on tone, save it for a conversation. Keep early messages clear. There is no prize for being so witty that the other person needs an instruction manual to understand you.
The longer episode includes my D2 date-request message. The principle is straightforward: make the invitation, sort out when and where, and see whether she wants to join you.
Before sending your next message, check that it actually moves towards the meeting you want. You are trying to arrange a date. You don't need to write a book first. I have already written those.
